Christmas Sweetness

An adorable little boy named Adam from Ireland has dreams of being a ground control CAPCOM. He has brittle bones diseases, so he can’t be an astronaut. Sharing these videos because they are so sweet! And God bless you, Commander Chris Hadfield of NASA for the inspiration and motivation for Adam.

Make It a Different Experience

Body Dysmorphia is a complicated thing.  It is a mental disorder that causes a person to see flaws that may not be there or emphasize something that doesn’t look perfect by the ridiculous beauty standards of society towards one’s body.  I was taught to hate my body since I was thirteen years old, which means over 31 years of hatred in my life.  This year I decided to change that because this pandemic brought out all the feelings!

I have a 13-year-old daughter.  She is growing and maturing.  Sadly, she compares her body and looks to Tik Tok influencers, her classmates, and even me.  I constantly reassure her she is growing and this is not something to waste her thoughts on.

A few days ago, I went shopping with my 13-year-old daughter.  We went into a popular athleisure clothing store.  This was the first time, she was buying clothing from this store.  I told her beforehand, she will need to try on many different styles because women’s pants are cut differently.  I grabbed 3 different styles of pants for her and we walked toward the dressing room.

As a parent, we sometimes believe our kids have no say in the decisions they make because we feel we know better or want to be in control.  But there are times, where we have to empower our children to understand consent.  I asked her if she wanted me in the dressing room with her and she said yes.  I turned my head when she undressed to give her privacy.  I heard her gasp as she couldn’t pull up the pants.  She told me she knew they were too tight.  I said in a calm voice, “let me go out and get a different size.”  We found a pair of pants she liked, bought them and we left.  There were no tears or sadness.  As we stood in line, she reached up to kiss and hug me and said, “Thank you.”  

If this were me as a thirteen-year-old, this would have been my experience.  I would have had no choice whether I could be alone in the dressing room or not.  I would be watched as I undressed and comments would be made on how heavy my legs and butt looked or observations of how much weight I gained.  If I had pants that were too tight, I would have received more criticism that I shouldn’t be that size and how I must be eating too much junk food.  And it was possible, the shopping trip would end and I couldn’t get the pants in my size because I was told I didn’t deserve them since I was too fat.  

Which experience sounds more pleasant?  And I still have those dressing room experiences as an adult with that mental tape that plays in my head.

I decided a long time ago, that dressing room experiences would be different for my daughter, then what I experienced growing up.  The same could be said for other experiences growing up.

As parents, we have a choice to parent the way we want to, not because it was the way our parents or caregivers parented.  If you don’t want to spank your child because you got spanked and it traumatized you, they don’t.  Discipline is important and necessary, but you can discipline a child in many more ways that don’t use violence or screaming.  If you don’t want your child to grow up with an eating disorder or body dysmorphia, create an environment of body neutrality and intuitive eating.  If you are not a parent or your children have grown, this can apply to managing your own life. If your habits or thought process isn’t bring joy in your life, find the resources and help to figure it out because it can be different!

November Thankful

Day #29- I am grateful for my body’s ability to heal. My recovery from oral surgery is taking longer than I want, but it is still happening. Many people have compromised immunity and have to endure a long recovery process. I do take my body for granted and honestly have been mean to it in regards to its size and shape. But it still keeps working for me despite the hatred. I am making strides to love it unconditionally.

Day #30- I am grateful for my home. I may wish for a nicer bathroom or more outdoor space, but it does truly fit the needs of my 3 person plus one dog family.

November Thankful

Day 25- I am grateful for the help of my husband and daughter as I recover from oral surgery. As I get older, the length of my recovery seems longer. I realize how fortunate I am to have people near to help me.

Day 26- Thanksgiving is today in America. This holiday is about reflecting on what is good about your life. However, I think about the Indigenous people who lost their land. The Kizh (pronounced Keech) Nation had this land where I live now. If you live in California, there is a website called native-land.ca that shows you the history of the land where you put your feet in California.

Day 27- I am grateful for direct deposit. Which also makes me thankful for my husband’s income which provides for our family. I am thankful he has had a job during this pandemic.

Day 28- I am grateful for companies who provide drive-up service and/or delivery. I tried to walk through a store today. It was the first time since my surgery that I have been outside. Unfortunately, I felt like I was about to pass out in the store. So we left. I ordered on line and we came back a few hours later for our things. I used to think people were lazy who used this service. I now realized it is necessary for so many reason and I don’t need to be judgmental if someone needs to pick up something from the store and they prefer to stay inside their car. Lesson learned.

November Grateful

Day 12- Successful sales from Facebook Marketplace. I sold my Instant Pot. I sold it to a health care worker who was moving into a place with her family without financial help. We thanked each other for not be serial killers. (You know one is always leery of meeting strangers to sell items).

Day 13- Soft pajamas.

Day 14-Sunny days.

Day 15-For meals that taste good.

Day 16-To be able to apologize for being wrong and receiving grace.

Day 17-For my friend, Galina, who constantly shows me, I need to be gentle with myself.

November Thankful

Days 8-11

I am grateful for rainy days (Day 8), volleyball recreation (Day 9) and over the counter products (Day 10).

I am eternally grateful for the people who serve our Armed Forces. They dedicate their lives and sacrifice so much for all of us to be free in the U.S. (Day 11)

November Grateful

Day #3 (Nov. 3)

I am grateful for the ability to vote and how many more people voted in this election. Many had to wait in line for hours and travel many miles to do their civic duty. Voter suppression is real and needs to be stopped. God bless the people who fight for American Citizens to have that ability.